Category: journal

I am incredibly grateful that I seem to have a little more than enough employment at the moment to keep myself from sliding into debt. However, the crisis government has created through their exploitation of the pandemic to further their “woke” agenda has left me wondering if the despair, horror, and anxiety I experience daily is akin to how civilians felt day to day during the bulk of the second world war. After the British secretly started bombing civilian targets in Germany, the not so secret bombings of London and other British cities communicated to the civilian populations of the world that governments cared so much about their soldiers they were willing to allow the families of the soldiers to die so long as it took some of the heat of them. Right now, civilians are dying for the cause. The cause being lining the pockets of Big Pharma executives and the pockets of politicians who never let a good crisis go to waste to expand their bank balance. Like civilians in German and British cities I don’t know if today is going to be the day that some thought policeman is going to decide I’ve had a little too much to think and puts me down to sleep in order to preserve the social harmony that is totalitarian governance.

And yet, while boldly driving my van outside the zone I’m supposed to be limited to, I found myself singing. Now, it’s entirely possible with my double exemptions I am allowed to travel a little further for the nice cheap petrol that saves me $20 a week, but like so many things these days, I have no clue what is allowed and not allowed. Hell, I don’t even know if it’s a crime to drive without a mask on. I don’t think the police know either. I can imagine them getting into the patrol car each morning and turning to their partner and asking, “Just making sure… are simple cloth masks still ok today?” but there’s an awkward silence as neither cop really knows what their job really is anymore. “Just play it by ear, and if we’re wrong, just act confidently wrong.” So as I sailed past two cops, who were obviously relieved it was a non fatal car accident they had been called out to, and not a dreaded “mysterious medical exemption” violation, I found myself just singing. Continue reading “Singing Through the Bombing”

During lockdowns many families are struggling with having their children at home all day every day. I’ve found that I can earn a pretty penny or two helping out with their home learning. It’s often awkward for me to watch children learn maths methods that seem insanely convoluted. When I can solve problems like 19 x 40 in my head faster than a child can type it into a calculator I am reminded that the purpose of school these days isn’t to educate the youth but to sabotage them. Many don’t know their times tables much less the techniques used in speed mathematics to quickly solve large number equations in their head. If I were to teach children these techniques their teachers would have to fail them for insubordination. It’s all about obedience to authority, not learning. O dear… that’s depressing… *sigh* Truth be told… I was feeling down today and I did not sleep well last night

I was up late angry about something, something that seems small now, and I knew last night that after a sleep and the distraction of work, my problem would be quite small by evening today and completely not worth me being angry about. Yet my best efforts at mindfulness and meditation were insufficient and it wasn’t until around 3am that I finally fell asleep. These angry moods bother me purely from the perspective of neuroscience. Long periods of anger cause damage to the cells linking the two hemispheres of the brain – the corpus collosum. Damage to these cells causes permanent changes in personality; the dreaded “grumpy old man” syndrome. Last week, before lockdown 6 started, I was feeling deeply relaxed and at peace. I could meditate to myself, and sometimes I would have this feeling of deep connectedness with the universe as though I was part of something and problems of mortality seemed somehow distant and unimportant. However, since the lockdown my anxiety levels have been elevated and it feels like a lifetime ago that I could relax that much. I don’t even fear the virus anymore, part of me wishes I would just get SARS-CoV-2 so I could either deal with it or die. But this endless delaying of the inevitable is more exhausting. A life lived in fear is a life never lived. Continue reading “The Home Learning Front”